Snow Day Musings

Sometimes the universe aligns perfectly and gives you exactly what you need even if you don’t know it….

I have been blessed so far in my life.  I have been blessed with wonderful friends and opportunities and while I don’t have exactly what I had originally thought I would at this time in my life, I am pretty close.  I have a decent job I like majority of the time, people who support me and pretty much all my needs (and some of my wants) are definitely covered.  So I haven’t been able to figure out why I am not that happy… until now.

I am missing passion. I am not talking about the physical romantic passion.. I am talking zest for life, take the bull by the horns kind of passion.

Overall, I am not a passionate person.

Now this has been in the back of my head for a long time, I just never really realized it.  I went to a salsa club a couple years ago and got a long lecture from a latino guy who first insulted my dancing skills and then expected for me to come running after him screaming.  Instead, I walked away from him and went and complained to my friend.  When he came by again, he proceeded to tell me that I was missing passion.  He was trying to get a rise out me.  A passionate person would have chased him down and told him how wrong he was.  Now at the time, I put this event down in my mind as just as a weird club experience and called it a day.  Not to give that random guy too much credit, but he was slightly right.

My passion has been lost or really never been found as an adult.  All kids have it but as we enter reality, we loose a part of it and I think its time mine comes back.

I saw that this past weekend as well.  I was out with two of the most passionate friends I have and realized that I was missing something.  I am missing that fire that makes you want to get out of bed in the morning, that drives you through even the most mundane days.

I want it back and I am on a mission to find it.

When I look back at a lot of my actions and choices the past couple of months… it looks like I started this quest.  I refused to spend another New Year’s eve in this country and enlisted my friend to go with me to Las Vegas.  I needed a change but didn’t realize why.

Which is why the snow day today is perfect. I called in “snowed in” to work  and decided today I was organizing my life today, start clearing out some clutter to make room for creativity and an open mind.   I am excited for what is to come.

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A new year, A new era…

Its been a while since I have been motivated to post a blog entry.  Life has felt a little mundane lately, the whole “work, sleep, repeat” routine isn’t the most exciting.  Christmas is now over (thankfully!) and its time to prepare for the new year.

Since the world did not end last friday (woo too) and really the end of the mayan calendar is supposed to signify the end of an era and not the end of the world as we know it,  I figure its a good time to start writing again.

I want to dedicate the next year to doing things that I love.  I want to blog, write, be creative, dance, knit, spend more time honing my photography skills and travel.  Growing up does not mean having to give up all the things you love doing.   I find that sometimes I forget that and focus only on my career.

2013 will be a year of finding balance for me and I am looking forward to it!

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101 in 1001 Final Count: The Other Category… the last one!

This is the last one! Wooo hoo…

Completed…3/8

  1. <<<Insert new goal here>>>> -FAIL

Do I have to state the obvious?

2.Send out at least 6 care packages to my friends who are away from home (1/6)- FAIL

One person got a care package… its expensive to ship stuff!

3. Volunteer for a cause that I find worthy– FAIL

I don’t have any excuses… just didn’t happen.

4. Keep in touch with my close friends that have moved away at least once every two months- HARD TO CALL

This came pretty close… luckily I have friends who are definitely better at keeping in contact than I am.

5. Update my photo frames with current pictures– FAIL

I got rid of a lot of old pictures but I haven’t replaced them yet. Le sigh…

6. Watch the sunrise at least twice (2/2)– COMPLETED

Getting up at 5 am for school and 4 am for work knocked this one off the list pretty quickly.

7. Do at least three things that would be considered out of character (3/3)- COMPLETED

Do I want to list them? Not extremely.  This was a good example of surprising yourself though. I do things I would consider out of character a lot more than I ever thought. It wasn’t until I was forcing myself to notice that I did.

8. Teach myself to see the positive in every situation and identify what makes me happy. By the end of the 1001 days I should be able to write it down.– COMPLETED

A lot of things make me happy. A lot of small things make me happy. They change day to day but there is a lot more “good” than not in my life. Sometimes you just need to remember that.

As you can see… my list is now done. The 101 page will be updated shortly with links and such and I am going to close this book on my life. I wish I would have kept better track of my progress as I went through but it was nice to look back. Here’s to new challenges!

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Long weekend = cold = :(

So this week I had big plans for the blog (as well as the rest of life)… yup… I had post it notes of ideas I got at work and everything. (yes I am that lame). But then on tuesday my valentine (aka. myself) decided it was going to throw me a curveball and I ended up with a really nasty cold and no voice.  What a v-day gift!

Since I am mainly isolated to my shared office, I decided to stick it out at work all week and then crash at home every night. I missed all my classes and fought to keep my energy and voice enough to make it through any meetings I had this week. So much for the blog posts I had prepared, so much for doing my italian homework and so much for my planned snowboarding outing this morning. All in all a bust leading into a long weekend.

So I sit here in my pyjamas still, writing away, doing laundry and planning out my long weekend which has dramatically changed since I originally planned it. I guess thats how life works, eh?

So I am going to make the best of it… I am going to do my nails today, see my grandpa for his 89th birthday and then just relax at home. I am going to try and make it downtown tomorrow for my usual pole dancing  “strength and conditioning” class and  maybe just maybe I will tackle my closet and give it a good clean out.  Maybe this is my body’s way of telling me that I just need to slow the fuck down for a minute in its most forceful way. It also gives me some time to spend with the blog and finish the 101 in 1001 which is a project I have let drag on way too long. This could be a good thing…

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101 in 1001 Final Count: The Learning Section

Wow… second last section to go… and then I will actually have to think of original blog posts and actually write about something other than this project. I am kinda excited to move on from this though.

Completed.. .3.5/12… eek…. 

  1. Make it through all my Italian beginner cds… FAIL-ISH

Didn’t make it through … started taking Italian classes though so I am doing something to learn. As of march I will be out of the beginner classes which is really scary.

2. Order the intermediate ones after the beginner ones are finished (ok I jumped the gun a little)– FAIL-ISH

See above..

3. Read the bible- all of it– BIG FAIL

Never happened. I get to Numbers and I get stuck. Lol maybe one day I will get enough motivation to pick it up again.

4. Read 1 book every 2 months (at least)– FAIL

Definitely didn’t happen. Work is way too crazy for me to focus on a novel. So far it’s taken me 8 months to get through Game of Thrones.

5. Blog reviews of the ones I really love or really hate (edit). –FAIL

Obviously this did not happen.

6. Take a beginner French class- FAIL

This did not happen because I feel like I should focus on one language at a time. I feel French is important to learn since it is Canada’s other language.

7. Read the Italian magazines I bought instead of looking at the pretty pictures- COMPLETED

I need the help of google translate and my Italian books but I do it. One day I should do a post of what the magazine looks like after I mark it up.

 8. Read 5 biographies of people I admire- FAIL

Didn’t happen. I read the Dali Lama’s biography and stopped.

9. Go to a Mars Lecture– FAIL

Work and at the time school has gotten in the way of this one.

10. Read the origin of species by Darwin and the Double Helix by James Watson-FAIL

Double Helix is sitting on my desk. So is “What Disturbs our blood” by James Fitzgerald as well.

11. Attempt to read a graphic novel of some sort- COMPLETED

Done… I read a couple…quite interesting. Next up will be the Jane Austin novels that Marvel turned into graphic novels.

12. Figure out all the features of my digital camera and learn how to play with them to take a really great picture.- HALF COMPLETED

I figured out a lot of the settings…. Now to figure out my new camera….Maybe this will become a photoblog then I don’t actually have to write anything.

 

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I’ve been Knitting… I swear

Okay so that may be a bit of a lie…. i maybe knit one or two rounds of my current project if I am lucky a week. But life’s been busy.

There are process shots though… (click to enlarge… i think)

This is at three repeats… and I am not loving the lime green right now. It doesn’t contrast that well with the grey. oh well… for stash yarn I really can’t complain.

My work has a knitting club that is starting in a couple weeks.  I am debating showing up though…. its weird sharing something that I consider part of my home life (yes… i am that exciting of an individual!) with co-workers. Especially ones that don’t really know me and/ or take me that seriously. Maybe it will help me network and get another contract once mine ends… you never know… knitters do stick together!

PS… I started tweeting… I am just getting my legs… but the sidebar has been added…

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101 in 1001: Final Count: Entertainment

Heres the entertainment section. Final count is not bad considering some of the others. Here we go…

Completed….5/16

Entertainment

  1. Watch AMI top 100 movies– FAIL

I hardly watched any movies during the 101 in 1001… actually I am not a big movie watcher in general. So who knows where this goal came from.

2. Go to the ROM-COMPLETED

I actually went to the ROM a couple different times during this challenge. They redid the bat cave, which is very exciting. If you get a chance to be in TO and go to the ROM definitely do it. One of my favourite places in TO.

3. Go to the Bata Shoe Museum– FAIL

I have never been to the Bata Shoe Museum and I LOVE SHOES.  Maybe one day.

4. Go to the Science Centre– COMPLETED

I went to the Science Centre when they had the Harry Potter exhibit.  The exhibit was awesome, the Science Centre not so much. Would have been better if I was younger (ie. Under 10) but then again I did not go to the IMAX theatre.

5. See the nutcracker on stage-FAIL

This did not happen during the 101 but I did finally go see it after Christmas this year. My lovely ex-Roomate Krys took me for my birthday.  It was blogged about here.

6. See an independent art show or installation-COMPLETED

Went to Nuit Blanche which is kinda a cop out but essentially its an all night art show that takes over the city once a year. Its an awesome time.

7. Attend a fashion show at TO fashion week-FAIL

Never happened… I usually have to work and not focused enough to find out about getting tickets.

8. Have a cupcake and cocktail party-FAIL

As long as I live with my parents, this is never going to happen.

9. Go to a concert of a non- mainstream artist– FAIL

Didn’t happen during the 101 in 1001… saw my friend Chris’s band play over Christmas. They are called “The Real” and they are pretty awesome so better late than never.

10. Watch the full BBC version of Pride and Prejudice-FAIL

Did not complete this during the 101 time frame… Found it on itunes and definitely spent 6 hours last weekend watching it. I would say I need more hobbies… but I really don’t.

11. Go to a Jazz Festival-FAIL

12. Go to a casino and actually put money in one of the slot machines-COMPLETED

Done and in Vegas I might add… but I didn’t win anything. I definitely don’t like how they replaced all the levers with buttons.

13. Have a movie marathon where a whole set of movies is watched in a row (ie a trilogy)– FAIL

Who has that kind of time?  (I really do which is the sad part)

14. Go to see the Santa Clause Parade– FAIL

I miss it every year….

15. Watch a live professional soccer game-COMPLETED

Done… and a couple times I might add. J Everytime it rained (and it is definitely not covered) or it was freezing. Maybe this year I will go in the summer.

16. Get a membership to the Bloor Cinema– FAIL

This definitely didn’t happen and now that they are renovating the theatre I don’t know what will happen. All I have to say is that it used to be the most adorable vintage theatre (with love seats and a balcony!!) and the first time I went in there it made my heart swoon!

Next up the learning section…

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